My Boys Are Here

I haven't seen the boys in almost 3 weeks.  I've missed them.  But finally they are here.  They flew in this evening.  I met them in the airport and promptly broke into loud discordant sobs.   It had been so long since I had seen  them, it felt so good to hug them.  My sons are with me and it feels good.

Of course the minute I started to cry the boys told me to stop.  And they told me I could never meet me at an airport again.  I don't care.  My boys are here.

I'm In Heaven

I am in the middle of a month's vacation in Myrtle Beach and it truly is my idea of heaven, or as close to it as is available on earth. Mom and I (the mom part of that is going very well) took several days to get here. We spent the first night with my nephew and his wife and the next two nights with mom's cousin and her husband. Both of those visits were wonderful. But I was really anxious to be in my own little house near the beach.

Mom and I got her Thursday afternoon. It is such a pleasant house. It is quiet, no kids, no animals, no TV, no radio--no husband. I do what I want, when I want and how I want. I'm working on quilting, knitting, sunning myself and reading a book a day. It's the life for me. At least for a couple of weeks. I miss the boys and I really miss Al. I have no one to snuggle next to in bed, to bounce ideas off. I miss him. But even so, it's nice to be here. I'm glad I came.

Being with my mother is nice. It is going better then I expected, but in a way it is a little sad. It's as if our roles are reversed. I am the responsible adult and she is -- oh she is somewhere between the obedient child and the well mannered guest. She is happy to go along with what ever I plan, happy to help in any way possible, but not willing, on anything more involved then what she wants for dinner, to take charge or make make a suggestions. This is not the mom I know and it's not the mom I really want. I would like our time here to be more equal, to be a partnership. That said, I am having a good time, and I am seeing her in a different light. I hear more if her stories from her childhood and her young adult hood. Not only am I enjoying them I can relate to them on a woman to woman level.

Too Dang Much Going On These Days

This is a tough year. I had cancer, my father died and now my mother has breast cancer. Sometimes life is just hard. Of course there is always a silver lining. I am almost done treatment, dad did not have to be in a nursing home and mom's cancer was caught early. Her surgery (lumpectomy) was today and she did well. Thank goodness.

Otherwise things are going well. I have been writing post in my head,but not getting around to really writing. One would have been about Michael Phelps's and his new book "How To Train
With a T-Rex and Win 8 Gold Medals". He caused a minor sensation in the area by agreeing to a book signing in the store a week or so ago. He was popular. Lots of people came to the store and he sold lots of books. He was there, he did his job (signing and selling books), but he was not very personable. I guess that makes sense. Too many people must want to meet him, talk to him, get a piece of him. And I have read and heard that people with such a specialized skill-interest are so highly focused they miss out on many other skills-such as socializing. But dang, it would have been nice if he could at least have thanked the staff for their assistance. By the way, I don't like his book.

Al and I spent a wonderful weekend in Western Virginia with friends. The only problem was that I am I want to relax and the friends were let's do this, then that, then tother. So we did this (miniature golf) -- (related bird story coming up), that ( tie dye t-shirts) and tother (find an immediate care facility on Sunday morning). I woke up with a bad headache, a fever and an infection.

The same weekend was the boy's first time staying home alone over night with out us. The boys managed well and even cleaned up after themselves. I even managed well and didn't worry about them. At least not too much.

Related bird story. -- When we went to miniature golf we heard this loud disjointed sound. We looked around and around and finally saw a cute little momma bird sitting on 3 or 4 eggs about 2 feet away from where we were standing. She had no protection other then a rail fence. She was beautiful and very protective but not very safe. I wanted to bring her home, but figured the cats would be a little to appreciative. Rumor has it she is a kildeerplover. Pretty bird. Not too bright.
S

It Has Been Ages

This is a tough year and I am not coping as well as I wish I was. Oh well, it has to get better.

There have been a few things that I have been meaning to write about. I am a reader. I love books. I love working in a book store, being surrounded by books, recommending books, hearing about my co-workers favorite books. Reading, for me is a pleasure, an education, a mind expanding experience.

Since I love reading so much it has always saddened me that neither of my boys has been a reader. In yet another attempt to interest them in reading I told them they had to read at least 3 books this summer and to show how important it was to me, I would pay them for each book they read. It's working, kind of. Ben is reading (Harry Potter) slowly. Albert is going to town on that series. He is on the last book and is planing to read Angles and Demons next. While I would love to take credit for the reading binge, the credit belongs partly to his girl friend for telling him to read but even more to his own good sense. He finally is realizing that reading can be fun.

Big Fire In Myrtle Beach

Thank God it is, at this point a good bit north of our new house.

We took Albert to orientation at Coastal Carolina University last week. The college was welcoming but the sessions were long and boring. The good news was that we got to spend time in our new house. It is beautiful, open, bright and airy. We all were impressed. We pulled into the SC house around 9 or so Thursday night. And wandered around this bright, gorgeous house that had no beds, in fact no furniture of any kind. This was the first time in a long time I slept on the floor, not that I really slept. I spent way too much of the night wandering around a dark empty house. I couldn't read because there was nowhere to sit and keep warm. I had brought down a number of blankets, but we were using them as mattress and blankets both. It was a long night.

Luckily we had planned well and had the basic furniture delivered. A bedroom set for Ben, 3 mattress sets (one for Ben, one forAlbert and one for us) a sofa, an armchair and foot rest, and a table and chairs. Life was good.

I Am Just About Ready To Complain About My Hair

It's at an awkward stage. It is too short to do anything with, but it just looks messy.

Of course it wasn't too long ago that I was whining about not having any hail

Life is tough.

Thursday we will be on our way to Myrtle Beach. Albert is scheduled for orientation at his college and we are all going too. We want to learn what we need to learn about college and see our new house. I can't wait.

It's about time I posted again

Standing on my feet for a 40 hour week, even if it is at a job I love, wears me out. I am off today and have cleaned house, run errands, started going to a quilt guild and felt a bit more alive.

Life is good.

Quilt guild.

It is hard to go join a large group of women is hard. At least for me it was hard.

I had heard about the group from a woman who came to the book store looking for a donation for the guild quilt show. She was nice and told me about the guild and invited me to come. Unfortunately I didn't see her when I entered.

I was a big girl, I pasted a smile on my face and looked for a friendly face. All I saw were faces of ladies working on quilts and talking to friends. I thought about backing out and pretending I had a home emergency, but instead I found a place to sit pulled out my quilt.

Eventually the woman next to me started to talk to me. Her name is Carol and she is quite nice.
So was the woman next to her, and the woman across from me and the woman on the other side of me and the ...well you get the picture. I had fun and plan to go back.

My Father's Memorial Service.

My sister arranged a beautiful service. I was pleasantly surprised by the number of old family friends who came.

Two brothers, about my age, came from New York. My oldest (longest duration) friend came from Princeton and brought her mother and her sister. Their coming meant and still means the world to me. One of the men and my childhood friend both talked about what my father meant to them. Thinking about it still brings tears to my eyes. It helped me to see my father from a different perspective.

Apple Cider Vinegar Hair

The other day, while working, a woman asked me to help her find a book about the apple cider vinegar diet. I found the book and placed it in her hand. She immediately opened it and showed me the value of this diet on helping to grow strong and healthy hair. I think she was trying to help. After all my hair is only about a half an inch long.

I don't think the apple cider vinegar diet helps with the chemo cut.

It is hard to be without my father, even though I wasn't really with him all that much. It is hard to lose him. I am sorrier for us then I am for him. I know he had a good life. But I don't know how my mother will do with out him. I am sorry for myself for not having him in my life and even more so in the life of my children. The sad part is that for my children, I miss more life my father shared with them when he was younger and more able. These last few years he has been too feeble and tired to have much of an impact on their lives. It is sad.

My Father Died Today

I know he was happy with his life, his wife, his family. I know he lived a good and productive life. I know he loved and was loved. I know he was 91 and his health had been declining for years. He wasn't ready to go and I wasn't ready to have him leave us all.

It comforts me that he, as Dylan Thomas' famous poem demanded, did not go gentle into that I good night. My father fought death long and hard. It took at the age of 91 nearly 2 weeks in intensive care and three abdominal surgeries before he gave up. He fought hard and long and that knowledge gives me comfort.

I love you Everett Clyde Ham. I will always remember that you were the first person to walk (and ride your tricycle) on the moon.

I Love Story Time

My store has story time twice a week. The clerk in the kids department gets to choose what to read. I usually get to read at least one day a week. I love it.

Wen usually have a group of 5 to 10 preschoolers and moms. I usually read at least one day a week. Generally I choose what to read but occasionally a boss will make a recommendation. Book choices give me a little insight into their personalities. One boss likes stories with morals, a woman boss likes stories staring strong and independent girls. I

What do my choices say about me? I read stories , like The Strong Pajamas, or Skippy John Jones, about kids who have adventures but come home safe to mom.

Dang Somewhere between .5 and 1 Million per Year

An article in this week's Newsweek, stated that Dooce earns between $500,000 and $1,000,000 dollars a year from the ads on her blog. Wow, I don't even like her. I think she is whiny and too thin skinned. But dang, that is real money.

I figure if I put ads on here I could make, oh maybe a dollar or two a year.

I have fuzz. I like my hair short and think I will keep it short. But not this short. I found a site on the web, zazzle, that makes buttons. I ordered a bunch that say "LOVE FUZZ!" . I'm going to wear one and give them to my fuzzsy headed co-workers. In fact I will give them to anyone who wants one. We can be an army of fuzz lovers. And we will be cute.

Hatless

I'm going hat less these days. My hair is very, very short and a bit thin. Even so I like the look and I love not having to wear a hat. My head does get cold easily so I always wear a hat outside and even sometimes in our house. It can be cold in here.

It won't be cold this summer in Myrtle Beach which is nice since our house will be done and I plan on spending at least a month there. I may be there by myself since Al's old job wants him back for 11 months. He's decided to accept the offer since the extra money will help pay for the second house and he likes the job they have offered. The only drawback is he won't have much vacation time so I will be spending much of that Myrtle Beach month with out him. I'll miss him.

Hat High in the Air

First things first. Today, for the first time since my hair started to fall out, I appeared in public without a hat. It felt good. I was high in the stands at the Comcast center watching the Lady Terps play Duke. I got a few weird looks and a few understanding looks but mostly I just I was just one of the many people enjoying the game. By the way it was a good game and we won. I was ready to test the public waters hatlessly and the test went well. It felt good.

I'm not ready to go to work hatless, or to go out to dinner hatless but I think I can go to a store hatless. Life is good.

Work was interesting today. Lots and lots of people but not much mess. I found a few books here and there to put away, but no one left stacks and stacks of books. And people who do leave stacks of books irritate the heck out of me. but the people who leave dirty dishes and fast food trash are the ones I really want to beat the heck out of.

I enjoyed seeing dads read to and chase toddlers around the store. I found books for pleasant people and I watched a 30 something year old woman read beginning readers to her self. I guess she was learning to read because she was sitting by herself going through a stack of easy books. I didn't realize what she was doing until I was putting away a stack of beginning readers. I stood about a foot from her and heard her read to herself. She got all the words right but wasn't really comfortable. The words didn't flow smoothly and comfortably. She will get there. Listening to her made my day.

Thanks Good Looking

I love the card. You are right, my hair will grow in it's own good time.

I am taking your advice to heart. Someday my hair will come. Maybe.

Luckily I don't need hair for work. I am now a Lead in the children's section. A promotion. Life is good.

Full time is, for me,thirty hours a week but these days 30 hours feels a lot like 50 or 60. I'm tired by the end of my week and usually spend one day sleeping 14 or more hours. I dare say things will get better.

The second day off each week is better. I have fun. I am making quilts and learning new techniques. I made one for my sister in law for Christmas, I completed a whole one and the top of the second for Al and I'm working on plans for a new quilt for Albert. He'll need one for college and wants Coastal Carolina's colors, teal and bronze. I'm thinking I'll do a sampler quilt for him showcasing various stars and squares. He also wants the letters CCU prominently displayed. I can do that.

I forgot to say, Albert has been accepted at his first choice school Coastal Carolina University. Life is good.

Maybe It Is Starting to Grow

I can't see any new hair, but Al says it's growing in. GL and Sweetie both thought it was growing. Maybe. But if so it is not growing in fast enough. I want more hair and I want it now.

This next has absolutely nothing to do with hair, but it's what is on my mind. The longer I work at the book store the more I get annoyed with people who leave a huge mess. It is a bookstore. I don't expect people to put there books away. But I do expect them to throw out their trash and bring their dirty dishes back to the cafe.

Yesterday was one of the days when I wanted to lecture several mothers. Two sets of mom's and toddlers came in at the same time. The moms sat and read magazines while the toddlers ran around pulling books of the shelves. That wasn't the problem. It happens a lot. Most moms either put the books away or put them in a stack. These mom's left the books scattered all over the kid's department. Several of the books were upside down (breaks the spine of the book) and one of the kids tore a page out of the book and scattered the paper around. Grr.

Oh well, it is part of the job and I can always go and mutter about them to coworkers and friends. And I do. It makes me happy.

I am working full time (30 hours) now. We wanted dental insurance and I needed to work 30 hours a week to qualify, I want to become the child's lead and I need to work 30 hours to do that and Al and I want to pay for the new house and I need to work 30 hours. The 30 hours isn't bad, but it is an adjustment. I am used to having more time to knit, quilt, sleep or goof off. I miss that goof off time. In addition I spend more time around messy, arrogant people who could clean up after themselves.

Maybe It Is Starting to